Hey, thanks for all of your replies!
Having a BMP should not necessitate having your parents support you financially, or see you miss out on having children or finding a life partner.
Cheers.
It's more about the uncertainty of whether or not I'll find a job if I choose a niche sub-specialty, being away from family (and not being there if something happens). I've spoken to quite a few people about BMPs and the response has generally been to go for it. I guess I wouldn't be too far from my family if something were to happen (only a few hours drive), but it makes me terribly anxious. I know someone who accepted a BMP who has a partner and now is completing her RoS. Them and their partner had to pack up their lives and move, and whilst it was great for the doctor's job, their partner now has long commutes into work. From what I've seen, there are sacrifices to be made that have their implications for the future. I also know someone who got a BMP and failed their final year twice. They had to pay their BMP back plus undergrad and another postgrad course for a career switch as their uni didn't let them continue med.
I think you need to step back and take a deep breath. The short answer is that you're in Year 10 -- considerations like what specialty you want to go into, how you're going to settle down and start a family and so on are way off in the future, so there's simply no point worrying about them now.
I'm actually in Year 12 haha. Thanks for your advice. Yes, worrying and ruminating about the distant future isn't entirely helpful. I have to agree with what chinaski said below. While it is important to not worry about these kinds of things so early, I just would love a clearer picture of what my future would look like. Accepting a BMP involves signing a legally binding contract. I don't come from a rich family and I can't just rely on the "bank of my parents" to pay my way out. I've lived regionally for a brief period of time and having seen the inequalities that exist between regional and metro healthcare, I'm definitely down for working rurally to help do at least a little bit to tackle them, but the idea of not having flexibility in my career puts me off. I know this is selfish.
You have to consider how much a decision would affect their life and career though.
Not taking a BMP because your chances of pursuing neonatology are reduced is really a non issue imo. As someone likely without meaningful experience in the field or alternative specialties, how are they meant to know whether neonatology is the breaking point for whether or not they apply to 30% of places across the country.
Similarly, not taking one because you dont know if you will settle down with a family etc is also a non issue.
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I can definitely see where you're coming from here. I think I phrased my original post in the wrong way. I'm not set on neonatology or any specialty for that matter. I think it's really important to actually go to med school, do internship and be exposed to specialties before making such a big decision. It's not a neonatology or nothing situation.
I'd go to med school to become a doctor, because that's the ultimate goal. Although, it would be nice to have some reassurance that I can have some flexibility in my career path and that making a decision at 18/19 doesn't close me off to taking certain avenues in such a broad field.
Should I just be more spontaneous and go with the flow?
Sorry for being so annoying. I'm just so worried about my future (when I should be excited?).